You’re not your best self when you’re drinking or using substances.
You’re also not your best partner or parent.
The ridiculous fights and arguments you have with your partner; they’re hurtful and probably never would have happened had you been sober. Snapping at your kids, being impatient. You don’t want to admit it because you love them so much, but bedtime is your favorite time so that you can use and not have to parent.
Getting up in the morning is so hard; you’re always tired and often don’t feel very good. Your life has been built around this habit.
Maybe you’ve noticed that your use is steadily increasing. It’s hard to cut back, and it usually creeps back up anyway. You’ve seen that it affects your relationships. It affects how you feel and work. You’re regretting what you did the days and nights before. It’s impacting your life and the way you feel about yourself. It’s upsetting, yet the anxiety and depression you feel when you consider quitting are upsetting, too.
The thought that keeps niggling at the back of your mind…
How do I know if it’s a problem?
Everyone has different thoughts here…
It’s not THAT bad.
I can cut back if I need to.
I can just drink on the weekends.
Should you be concerned? Well, if you’re reading this page, then it’s probably an issue. And I’m betting that others have likely mentioned it a time or two as well.
It’s worth taking a closer look…
No matter if it’s cigarettes, marijuana, liquor, prescription pills, other substances, or something else.
There’s always something behind substance use disorder…
Fear, pain, disappointment. So many difficult feelings you want to avoid seeing… and feeling. It feels so much easier to numb the feelings with narcotics or liquor.
To not have to face the reality that your marriage is crumbling.
To avoid the reality that you really are not happy with your life.
That you hate your job but can’t see a way out.
To realize exactly how much money you’re spending.
And to avoid the memories of that thing that happened so long ago yet feels like yesterday.
It didn’t start this way; at first, it was just a quick and easy escape. It took the edge off and made it easier to cope. There really weren’t any problems until there were. Looking back, you can see that there was a turning point. The turning point was when it became too much and too often, causing negative side effects – money problems, relationships problems, and issues at work.
It started causing harm to you and your loved one, and that’s when you knew this can’t go on.
I can help, and it doesn’t have to be a dark or heavy experience.
The reality is that the process of behavior change is the same… whether you’re trying to stop biting your nails, cursing, or using substances. Let me help you through this process, tailoring each step to your unique needs.
First, we need to understand why you’re misusing substances.
Using controlled substances or liquor is a coping skill for a reason. The question is, what are you trying to cope with? Is it a difficult relationship? Maybe it’s the dissatisfaction at work. Whatever it is, we’ll work together to address that issue to reduce the need to ‘cope’ and increase satisfaction and contentment.
Everyone has a struggle. While yours is unique to you, there is no shame or embarrassment in having a difficult time. In fact, there’s relief and pride in getting help and addressing what needs to be fixed.
Together, we’ll work to help you identify triggers.
For some of my clients, getting off work is a trigger. They used to go to the bar or straight home to drink afterward. For others, being in a certain part of town is a trigger. Knowing what your triggers are means we can make strategic choices to avoid being triggered to use.
Together, we will work to understand risky behaviors and choices that may potentially lead to using. Are you more likely to drink when around an old drinking buddy? Do you take more pills when out dancing? Knowing these risky behaviors and choices means you can learn to identify them ahead of time and craft a plan that aligns with your short- and long-term goals.
You need tools to help you maintain your sobriety.
How to build and maintain motivation for change is an important skill. Having support and guidance is a major step toward maintaining long-term motivation. We’ll work together to build the skills necessary to cope with urges.
Deciding on and creating boundaries for yourself and those in your life is a key to long-term success. We’ll work to identify where they’re necessary and how to make them successfully. Finding healthy and sober supports and people who understand the journey you’re on is an invaluable part of a recovery toolbox.
It can be easy to see the bad things in the world and the struggle. Practicing gratitude is an evidence-based recovery tool that works to counterbalance anxiety and depression – learning to be okay, taking it slow, creating a healthy routine that allows you to enjoy the beauty of life. Embracing this shift will allow you to read that book you’ve always wanted to, play catch with your kids, look around and see the good things in your life.
Don’t let chaos and regret be the end of your story.
Whether you’re “truly” battling abusing substances, if you are going down this path of questing your use with liquor or controlled substances, it is time to reach out for help. Successfully recovering from substance use disorder requires you to take it one step at a time. Make today your first step.
Now is the time, call today: (971) 915-0195.
We can do this… together.